Accentuate the Positive! · blogging · Books · Introspection · Something wonderful

Gratitude, no. 1

Since Thanksgiving I’ve been wondering what I want to do with this blog. (You’re sure to have noticed I haven’t posted since … early November.) Most blogs focus on a theme, something more narrow than a general catch-all web diary, which this one has been. Over Christmas I read the book One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are by Ann Voskamp. A friend dared Ann to capture one thousand blessings, one thousand things she was thankful for, in her journal. The experience changed the way she saw thanksgiving – eucharisteo.

That’s what I’m going to be doing now with Notes from Aunt Jim. Maybe I’ll even change the name one day. But I’m going to start documenting at least one blessing, one gift, per day. From simple to profound. From a clean pair of slacks that didn’t need ironing on a day when I was rushing out the door, to … who knows where this will lead. But I do expect it to change my attitude, and so my life.

Today, my gift was being able to hear Beth Greer. She spoke and sang at our church tonight for the Ladies’ Night Out. Her passion for Jesus revitalized my flagging spirit.

Accentuate the Positive! · holiday · just plain fun · Something wonderful

Something wonderful….

We’re already well into the New Year as marked by the Jewish calendar …. 5772!

Over the past week (Sept. 28-30) Jews celebrated Rosh Hashanah.

I started this past week in a bad mood. Then I saw this video. I played it every day since I saw it. My bad mood went away, just in time for a new year. I may be a day late, but Shanah Tovah, y’all!

Accentuate the Positive! · Introspection · me · Toastmasters

Begin with the end in mind

This post is the text of a speech I’ll give to the Two Notch Toastmasters Friday morning. It’s part of a series I’m doing on the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.

“Begin with the end in mind” — it’s the habit of vision.

All behaviors stem from a thought pattern, a paradigm – a way of seeing the world.  The paradigm for this habit is: I live by design. To be ineffective all you have to do is adopt the opposite paradigm – I live by default.  The principle behind this habit is that mental creation precedes physical creation.

When I was in college, in my first journalism lab class, our professor assigned us to write our own obituaries. Now, that’s beginning with the end in mind! I’ve learned this is a technique sometimes used in therapy. The object is to get you thinking about how you’d like others to remember you. It’s also a goal-setting technique – what do you want to have accomplished in life?

Sadly, I can’t remember much of what I wrote then, twenty-something years ago, except that it was all fanciful. Even as I was writing it, I thought at the time the exercise was nothing but fantasy. I even re-wrote my beginnings to state I’d been born in Paris, which I thought sounded romantic. I wasn’t too goal-oriented then, because I really can’t remember anything else I wrote.

But over the years I learned more about writing your goals down, and then working to achieve them. Some have been achieved, some not. I remember writing three goals – three ends I want to achieve – down on a notecard about seven years ago. These are three goals I still want to achieve – and am still working toward.

The first is: Weigh 127 1/2 pounds. Not 135 pounds, a goal which I’ve actually achieved once before in my adult life, nor 145 pounds, which is the top end of my healthy weight range. Or even a flat 127 pounds, which is obviously too low. But 127 1/2. I’m a member of Weight Watchers. It’s not going so well. But I made a commitment last year to join and never quit again, so I’m still a member. And, once again this week, I started over. What is a diet but the triumph of hope over experience?

Second: Write a novel. Like I said last week at Toastmasters, there are two great groups of people in this world: those who were going to go to law school, and those who were going to write a novel. I’m not going to law school.

But I haven’t yet written a novel. I’ve written newspaper articles, blog posts and long, overwrought letters to friends. But no novel. And I have not the foggiest idea how to get there. That’s what I was mulling over the idea last week, toying with it, of taking an online class called “Beginning Writers Workshop.” It’s a six-week program in creative writing. It’s more like a writing lab with lots of practice. Just reading the demo lesson got me excited about it … a stepping stone to fulfilling my goal, and my dream.

And yet – the first thing my inner critic asked is when will you have time to do this? I’m already signed up for another class for work. That’s on Database Development. I have to do that one, and it’s going to be hard. Plus, I’m an area governor in Toastmasters, and that’s turned out to be a little more involved than I first thought, what with organizing contests, District Executive Committee meetings and club visits. My appointment lasts through June 30, 2012. And then, of course, there’s my job.

But isn’t this the type of thinking that keeps us from “moving confidently in the direction of our dreams?” If I’m too busy to take a step toward my goals, then I’m just too busy.

Remember – begin with the end in mind. Do I want to come to the end of my days knowing I spent 40, 50+ years in the workforce, then came home and watched TV? No! That’s one of the reasons I got so involved in Toastmasters. But, I also can’t fritter away my time with activities – no matter how individually meaningful – that don’t move me forward in achieving my long-held goals.

So I signed up for that class. And I’m going to squeeze it in – because it is that important to me.

Ah yes – what was that third goal I wrote down in 2005?

It’s even more spectacular than the first two. (Although some would say I have a better chance of reaching this one than hitting 127 1/2 pounds again.)

Eat dinner at the White House

Actually, I’d settle for a casual lunch in the Residence – or maybe Movie Night at the White House theatre.

What prompted this outlandish goal? I remember reading about how Lou Holtz coped during a down moment in his life when his coaching career wasn’t going so well. He was sitting at home and decided to write down a list of goals he wanted to achieve in life. He wrote down over 100 goals and achieved them all. One was eating dinner at the White House.

Now, I have no idea how I’m going to achieve my goal. I can’t imagine why any President would invite me over – I’m certainly not handing out $250,000 donations. I know just writing it down won’t make it happen. I may have to write a Pulitzer-prize winning book. That’s also a stretch. But it’s a goal, it’s on my card, and it certainly would be something to talk about at the ol’ nursing home, wouldn’t it?

Begin with the end in mind … it’s a way to bring design to our days.

Accentuate the Positive!

Joy

After the irritating hours of Saturday – Lost Wallet! Golfer’s Elbow! Continued pain! Buying an elbow brace! – I had a wonderful surprise today in church. I was a few minutes late and so had to wait at the back until the handbell choir was done. (Our church has such a nice custom of not letting people move down the aisles while a choir or soloist is performing. You have to wait until it ends.) I had to nip halfway up to the front past my usual spot to find a place. Later, when I got up to greet those seated around me during the “handshake” portion of our Baptist service I turned around and saw behind me a friend I’d been trying to reach for two years.

Joy abounds.

Accentuate the Positive! · me · Resolution Updates

A walk across the dam

Finally – doing something to live up to my 2nd resolution: to be healthy. I walked across the Lake Murray dam* Tuesday and Wednesday nights.

The Lake Murray Dam, aka officially the Dreher Shoals Dam
Everyone here knows it as the Lake Murray Dam; it takes walking across it to know that the "official" name is Dreher Shoals Dam.
Walkway on top of the Lake Murray Dam
Setting out on the walkway of the Lake Murray Dam. There are lots of walkers from 6 p.m. on.

The walk one way across is 1.8 miles. Lots of folks in Irmo and Lexington are out exercising on the dam walkway.

Love this Daylight Savings Time – it’s giving us more time to walk at night. And the beautiful weather is great for walking. Now, if we could just do something about the pollen.

Dreher Shoals Dam Intake Towers in the distance
The Intake Towers for the Dam are in the distance.

I wonder how often this little contraption is used to get workers back and forth from the dam to the Towers:

The "bosun's chair" to the Towers
If this were a ship, I'd say this was a "bo'sun's chair." Let's call it the "bo'sun's chair" to the Towers, shall we?

Sorry for the terrible photos – I forgot my camera and was relying on my itty-bitty non-smart phone.

*Okay, three-quarters of the way across and back. But that still comes to 2 miles total – I checked it with my car odometer after the walk.

Accentuate the Positive!

Changing the negative to positive

My friend Bess sends me the newsletters from Sparkspace, a business retreat center which helps employees build great teams. One of the January newsletters is well worth looking at again – it’s on how to turn the top five causes of negativity at work into positive solutions. What are the top five?

  • Poor communication
  • Gossip
  • Wrong assumptions
  • Not feeling valued/lack of respect
  • Too much to do, too little time

Ever feel like that’s happening to you? I read through that list and thought he worked at my job. Then I read further – and the answer to solving those problems lies within you.

Accentuate the Positive! · Introspection

Thought for the day

“Spring passes into summer and through summer and autumn into winter. Only the more surely, by its ultimate return, to triumph over that grave toward which it resolutely hastens from its first hour. We mourn over the blossoms of May because they are to wither. But we know withal that May is one day to have its revenge upon November, by the revolution of the solemn circle which never stops. Which teaches us in our height of hopes ever to be sober. And, in our depths of desolation, never to despair.”
– Cardinal Newman

Accentuate the Positive! · me

Now all we need is a new bedspread….

Before and After: De-cluttering the spare room of 18 months of piled up books means the floor and bed are visible again!

Before
Before the big "de-cluttering"
The library/bedroom/office after de-cluttering
After the de-cluttering!
Accentuate the Positive! · Family

Happy Anniversary!

On this day 14 years ago my brother B. married up.