Category: Accentuate the Positive!

Accentuate the Positive! · Beauty · Books

“Live Alone and Like It”

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Timeless advice for the single gal

As someone who has lived alone for most of my adult life, I haven’t always liked it. But growing older and wiser makes me glad for all the many blessings: a bathroom to myself! No one to wake me up by snoring. I can eat whatever I want, whenever I want!

One of my favorite blogs is Apples and Roses, the blog of Dorothy Cummings McLean, who once wrote Seraphic Single, blog full of advice for single women. She recommended “Live Alone and Like It” as “the most enjoyable book I ever read on the Single Life.” As I adore McLean’s writing, I immediately ordered the book.

Vogue editor Marjorie Hillis published this slim volume (only 154 pages) in 1936, back in a time when a woman past the age of 25 was considered “on the shelf.” Her book became the eighth most popular non-fiction book of the year and one of the best sellers of the decade. Obviously, attitudes were starting to shift.

This charming book reads as if your chic, worldly-wise older aunt or cousin came over for cocktails or tea and decided to share her wisdom. The language is delightfully dated: Hillis speaks of a woman’s “beau” coming to pick her up, and that scrambled eggs and sausages are favored at the “smartest debutante parties.” The twelve chapters cover everything from how to furnish your home or apartment, the necessity of keeping up with the latest styles – not spending money you don’t have, but never being dowdy – as well as the morals of a single lady. (“A Woman’s Honor is no longer mentioned with bated breath and protected by her father, her brother, and the community. It is now her own affair.”)

Never, never, never let yourself feel that anybody ought to do anything for you. Once you become a duty you also become a nuisance.

Chapter Two, “Who Do You Think You Are?”

Her breezy chapters chock-full of good tips close with case studies of single, divorced, or widowed ladies who demonstrate their good sense – or who serve as a warning to others. My favorite was case study XXV: the lady who knew how to spend a weekend alone: spending Saturday at the beauty salon while her housekeeper cleaned, taking a good tub soak at home before enjoying dinner served on a tray by said housekeeper, then relaxing with breakfast in bed the next day. Sounds wonderful!

This is your house, and it’s probably the one place in the world where you can have things exactly as you please.

Chapter Six, Setting for a Solo Act

The many mentions of bed jackets and satin pajamas make me think of Eva Gabor in “Green Acres” – but they also make me want to upgrade my wardrobe immediately. Every single woman deserves that luxury!

New hope for the New Year
Accentuate the Positive! · Gratitude · holiday

New hope for the New Year

AuntGemLeave a comment

My friends asked me to do a devotion for the New Year at our community New Year’s Eve party. Here it is.

For the past few day, I’ve been searching for the perfect verse to illustrate a devotion. One that talks about hope, and plans. Of course, I thought about Jeremiah 29:11, and Ecclesiastes 3:1-8. Somehow, though, nothing gelled.

Then on Sunday, December 31, I found the passage – by listening in church. One of the things I love about my church is that it uses a lectionary, a prescribed series of readings for every day of the year, and especially Sundays. If you follow it, you’ll read through the whole Bible in two years. What’s nice about it is that 1) Anglicans all over the world are studying those verses the same day and 2) it forces you to read parts of the Bible you’d otherwise skip. We always have an Old Testament reading, a Psalm, a New Testament reading, and a reading from one of the Gospels. Sunday’s gospel passage, one of my favorites, spoke to me. I want to share it with you.

The reading is from the Gospel of John, starting in Chapter 1, verse 1, continuing through verse 18.

1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2 He was in the beginning with God. 3 All things were made through him, and without him was not any thing made that was made. 4 In him was life, and the life was the light of men. 5 The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.

6 There was a man sent from God, whose name was John. 7 He came as a witness, to bear witness about the light, that all might believe through him. 8 He was not the light, but came to bear witness about the light.

9 The true light, which gives light to everyone, was coming into the world. 10 He was in the world, and the world was made through him, yet the world did not know him. 11 He came to his own, and his own people did not receive him. 12 But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God, 13 who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God.

14 And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth. 15 (John bore witness about him, and cried out, “This was he of whom I said, ‘He who comes after me ranks before me, because he was before me.’”) 16 For from his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace. 17 For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. 18 No one has ever seen God; the only God, who is at the Father’s side, he has made him known.

John 1:1-18

There’s so much in that passage we could just meditate on it all day! But as I listened to it, and read it and pondered it later, I realized that this passage covers so many of the themes we associate with the New Year.

Hope

Verse 5 tells us that the “Light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” That is a major reason for hope there.

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Security

When I start to think about this new year before us, I can get pretty wound-up thinking about all the things that could go wrong. Will the election go off smoothly? Will we have riots this summer like we did in 2020? Will the wars going on now intensify?

But then I read verse 3: “All things were made through him and without him was not any thing that was made.” I realize – the creator of the Universe is still with us, and He’s got this. We can be confident of his love for us, because after all, as verse 14 tells us: “the Word became flesh and dwelt among us.” God loved us so much he became man by sending us his son, Jesus. No matter what the year throws at us, we can have His peace.

Most importantly, verse 12 reminds us that anyone who believes in His name is given the right to become a child of God. How amazing! What’s even better – we don’t have to earn that right. In fact, we cannot earn it. Verse 13 goes on to say that these children were “born not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of men, but of God.” We don’t do anything. We receive a gift.

Peace

Knowing that anyone who receives Jesus, who believes in His name, has salvation, is the key to peace. That takes away my anxieties when I remember that. Let’s remind ourselves often this year, that whatever we face, we face as children of the Living God, who came to Earth to be with us, and who loves us so much that “from his fullness we have all received grace upon grace.” This is how we can be happy in 2024!

Still shining brightly
Accentuate the Positive! · Beauty · Christmas · Family · Gratitude · holiday · Something wonderful

Still shining brightly

AuntGemLeave a comment

This Christmas tree always brings joy

This is a re-run of a post I put up several years ago – which is a reprint of an article I wrote in 1993 for a small weekly paper. When my parents downsized they gave me the tree. Enjoy!

Tonight I put up the tree I “inherited” from Dad when they downsized to a patio home. Here’s the story I wrote about that tree 17 years ago for The Georgia Guardian newspaper. Tomorrow or Thursday I’ll post pictures of the decorated 2010 tree. Tonight you’ll have to make do with a picture of Pickles sitting underneath the tree:

Pickles poses by a copy of the original story of our family tree. Dad loved the story so much he matted and framed it. Once you read it, you’ll see why.

Pickles underneath the Christmas tree.
Pickles poses by a copy of the original story of our family tree.

A Tree for All Seasons

First published in the Georgia Guardian, Dec. 24, 1993
Copyright Jennifer Rust

Every family has its Yuletide traditions, and ours is no exception. We’ll be going to parties, attending the Christmas Eve candlelight service at church and decorating the tree. Yet we do something lots of people would never dream of: We pull our tree out of the attic each year.

Yes, we have an artificial tree. During my impossible-to live-with teenage years, I continually referred to it as the fake tree. I would groan and roll my eyes each time my dad pulled it out of its box, telling the story of how he bought it in 1968 for only $15. (What a bargain, I can hear him say.)

When I was in high school I would beg my parents to buy a real tree. We could decorate it with strings of popcorn and other “natural” ornaments. But each year we’d re-assemble that same old tree, sticking branches into the holes on the trunk pole and bending them into place so they’d look right.

As time passed, my brother and I graduated, left the house, got jobs. Now, I have only a few days at home to celebrate the holiday. And I’ve noticed a change in the way I feel about that tree. It happened the year before last, when my dad said, “I think we might replace this one with a new tree.”

You would have thought he suggested we replace Mom. I gasped, “No! You can’t get rid of this tree!” Even as I said it I realized why.

Because of all the laughs we have putting it up each year … because all the made-in-kindergarten ornaments look just right on it … because we’ve had it for 25 years, and how many things last that long? Heck, that tree is the same age as my brother Bill and we’re keeping him.

That artificial, fake but eternal tree has become so much more than a decorative centerpiece upon which to hang the ornaments. It is a symbol of all those Christmases past and all the memories we share. That glorious fake fir has become a holiday tradition of its won. I wouldn’t trade it for the most majestic blue spruce around.

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Accentuate the Positive! · Introspection · me · this and that

Six Years without a TV

AuntGemLeave a comment

On December 22, 2016, I moved to my current home. At that time, my TV was an old, old model – circa 1998. My dad gave it to me after he upgraded to a flat screen.

But first, a tangent: The previous television I had was even older: I had a 1988 model that I kept until the over-the-air broadcast signal changed. The day I took that monster to the Best Buy to recycle it and get a $10 gift certificate I almost dropped it in the parking lot. A sweet 21-year-old guy saw me and rushed to help by carrying it into the store. He put it down on the customer service counter and said, “My wife and I bought this TV here last week and it doesn’t get those HDTV signals. We’d like to return it.” The Geeks burst out laughing.

That TV I had in 2016 was beyond saving. The remote didn’t work at all, no matter what. The picture was fuzzy, and the thing was still a huge monster. So, I put it out on the curb and called the city of Forest Acres for electronics pickup. Thus began my six years and counting without a TV.

And it hasn’t been too bad

I have two huge monitors on my computer in the home office, plus two laptops, and an iPhone. I certainly don’t lack for screentime. And if I have to watch a movie, I just adjust one of those big monitors, cosy up in the big chair in my office and stream something. That takes care of that.

Plus, more time for reading. And hobbies!

I probably would never have discovered some of my favorite podcasts without going TV-less. And I do have SO MANY MORE books than I’ve ever had before – and more time to read.

All-in-all – win-win!

Stirring up a taste of Christmas…
Accentuate the Positive! · Cooking · Family · Gratitude · Hobbies · holiday · just plain fun

Stirring up a taste of Christmas…

AuntGemLeave a comment

Yes, even before Thanksgiving! Today in the Anglican church calendar it’s the last Sunday before Advent, also known as Christ the King Sunday. This Sunday’s collect, from the 1549 Book of Common Prayer in the Anglican church started with the words “Stir up…”:

Stir up, we beseech thee, O Lord, the wills of thy faithful people; that they, plenteously bringing forth the fruit of good works, may of thee be plenteously rewarded; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Book of Common Prayer, 1549

I’m starting the process of making a fruitcake, which does have to age a full month. For the past few years I’ve been making extra-special fruitcakes – not the bricks of old, but something that people may actually like once they take a bite out of politeness. I love seeing the reaction of people who hate fruitcake. No, you don’t. You hate Claxton fruitcakes. So do I!

This year I’m making a recipe which calls for 6 full cups of candied citrus peel. The sweet teenager at the Publix didn’t have a clue what I was asking about, and we both started consulting Google Images. He finally led me to the fruitcake ingredient aisle (they move it EVERY YEAR.) The only thing there were those icky-sweet pieces of “fruit” that were in neon colors. Time to make my own. I searched for a recipe and found an easy one on AllRecipes.com.

Life Lesson: Easy is not the same thing as Fast. Or Cheap.

– Aunt Gem

First, my actual cake recipe called for six full cups of candied peel. I shrugged and bought up two bags of Cuties (easy to peel!) and a bag of lemons. I’m $10 in and I haven’t even started on the almonds. Then I started peeling.

Only halfway to 2 cups of peel

Finally, I hit two cups after I emptied an entire bag of clementines. I have a lot of fruit to eat in the next few days. Fortunately, I’m making ambrosia for Thanksgiving.

This is what two cups of peel looks like at the start of the process.

First, you bring to a full boil. Then, you let it simmer for 10 minutes.

Then you drain everything – and repeat the whole process two more times. Finally, you wind up with this:

The two cups I started with shrunk.

And now, over an hour later, I still have four more cups to make. This fruitcake better be worth it, Martha!

Loving my podcasts
Accentuate the Positive! · educational · Hobbies · just plain fun

Loving my podcasts

AuntGemLeave a comment

Lately, all my spare time is devoted to listening to podcasts. The fiction ones are my favorite, but I love certain current events commentators and there’s a couple of funny podcasts which lighten my mood every time. See my list below – you may find a new favorite. And let me know of any good ones you have!

Comedy

Wrong and Wronger

If you choose just one podcast to add to your collection, make it “Wrong and Wronger.”

This one stars Steve Olivas, a psychologist turned humorist turned author for rock stars, and James Breakwell, the Twitter-famous “funny dad” who writes hilarious stories about his family of four girls and the adventures they share. Steve and James started podcasting together after an inteview when the two realized their sarcastic jabs at each other “clicked.” Originally, the show was about the two of them taking opposing sides (by coin toss) on the weighty issues of the day: dogs vs cats, mustard vs ketchup on hot dogs, bubble wrap vs peanuts. Then they’d invite their audience to vote for the winner. About 160 episodes in, they decided to branch out and now just natter on about whatever’s on their mind. You should start at episode 206, when they started discussing the saga of Steve’s new rural property in Tennessee, now known as Rattlesnake Ranch.

I discovered this podcast during August 2021, when the news was full of the disastrous way we left Afghanistan, and the ensuing tragedies. I had to stop listening to the news for a while – and I chose this podcast as a way to find some sunshine in those horrible days. Steve and James’ crazy stories and hiliarious debates made me forget all the ugliness each time I listened. If you choose just one podcast to add to your collection – make it this one!

The Jennifer Fulwiler Show

I love this lady. She is about 10 years younger than I am and has six kids under the age of 18. She’s Catholic and a standup comedian. In other words, she’s as different from me as anyone could be. She spent most of her young married life at home with the kids, while writing funny books and starting a blog about her conversion, then started a radio show, then followed her dream of being a stand-up comedian! The description on Apple: “This podcast is like if someone gave a TED Talk after three mimosas.” You will love her!

History and Commentary

The MartyrMade Podcast

Darryl Cooper covers history, religion, philosophy, ritual – all seeking to bring meaning out of chaos. I first discovered him through where else, Twitter. His latest podcast is an in-depth look at the West Virginia Coal Mine Wars, and the injustices done to coal miners as they sought to better their lives. Other favorite episodes include the series he did on Epstein and his audio versions of his Substack posts.

Honestly with Bari Weiss

Speaking of Substack writers, I’ve been following Bari Weiss’s work at her Common Sense Substack since she left the New York Times. As an extension of that, she’s started her podcast Honestly. She’ll interview a guest on one of the issues of the day – and that guest can be anyone, liberal, conservative, whomever. It’s thoughtful, thought-provoking, and dare I say, shows surprising balance in such a polarized time.

Fiction

The Leviathan Chronicles

Instead of drifting off to sleep to a TV screen, I drift off to sleep listening to a podcast story. The trouble with the Leviathan Chronicles is that these science-fiction episodes are so well-written, well-acted and voiced (with over 60 actors) that I have to stay awake to listen to just one more episode. The initial three seasons focus on the story of a hidden city – known as Leviathan – hidden deep in the Marianas Trench in the Pacific. Just start listening to it – you’ll be so involved in the characters and the relationships the author builds that when the story becomes fantastical – you’ll be swept along.

And now for my favorite…

Wooden Overcoats

I’ve loved this funny, witty, oh-so-beautifully written and acted British podcast for the last few years. It’s only 4 seasons long – and I’ve yet to finish the last two episodes because I can’t bear to have it end. Here’s the perfect description, from the podcast website:

RUDYARD FUNN RUNS A FUNERAL HOME ON THE ISLAND OF PIFFLING.
It used to be the only one. It isn’t anymore.

Rudyard Funn and his equally miserable sister Antigone run their family’s failing funeral parlour, where they get the body in the coffin in the ground on time. But one day they find everyone enjoying themselves at the funerals of a new competitor – the impossibly perfect Eric Chapman! With their dogsbody Georgie, and a mouse called Madeleine, the Funns are taking drastic steps to stay in business…

-Wooden Overcoats
Time flies when you’re lost in a good book
Accentuate the Positive! · Books · educational · just plain fun

Time flies when you’re lost in a good book

AuntGemLeave a comment

Humidity and heat = AC and books!

I chose to take June off from blogging. Then the heat and humidity of a South Carolina summer sapped me of the strength to do anything more in my garden than just water the plants and let them be. Doing so left me nothing to blog about from my garden – how many posts can I write on wilting vines?

Summers in SC are perfect for staying indoors, reading, sipping sweet iced tea, and enjoying Mr. Willis Carrier’s wonderful invention of commercial air conditioning. To keep this short, I’m just posting a list of some of the books I read since June, with maybe one or two lines of description. Tell me what a person reads and I’ll tell you about that person….

June

Kindle

Out of the Silent Planet
by C. S. Lewis

The beginning of Lewis’ lesser-known trilogy for adults. Fanciful yet deep. It rewards constant re-reading.

Killing Kennedy: The End of Camelot
Bill O’Reilly, Martin Dugard

I’ve read so many books about the Kennedys – this was one of them. I can’t remember much about it.

January 6: How Democrats Used the Capitol Protest to Launch a War on Terror Against the Political Right
Julie Kelly

Julie Kelly has been the voice of those who have no voice in this matter. Read it and be infuriated.

OUTCRY: Why does Pope Barnabas release Catholic clergy from their vows of celibacy?
Ned Cosby

A piece of fiction which imagines a future pope determined to rid the church of sexual abuse.

Paperback and hardcover

Uncharted (1) (Arcane America)
Sarah A. Hoyt and Kevin J. Anderson

I love Sarah’s blog and love to read her books.

July

Kindle

The Devil’s Hand: A Thriller (Terminal List Book 4) AND

In the Blood: A Thriller (Terminal List Book 5)
Jack Carr

I had to read both of these to finish the series before I watched an episode of Amazon Prime’s Terminal List series. My conclusion: I’m happier with the books.

Blessed With All This Life (The Wilder Bunch Book 7)
Max Cossack

The last of the Wilder Bunch series, and yes, of course I have them all. I was turned on to the famous novelist Max Cossack by his lovely wife who writes the Ammo Grrrll columns at Powerline blog.

Paperback and hardcover

The Bodies of Others: The New Authoritarians, COVID-19 and The War Against the Human
Naomi Wolf

Still finishing this one up – it makes my blood boil!!

August (so far)

Kindle

The Iron Web
Larken Rose

A chilling look at a possible dystopian future, where men have forgotten how to be free.

The Puppet Masters
Robert A. Heinlein

My introduction to a master – thank you, Sarah Hoyt!

The Moon Is a Harsh Mistress
Robert A. Heinlein

I’m 75% of the way through this and it makes me cheer. The transportees settled forcibly on Luna (our moon) have risen up and declared their independence. I’d heard of this one before I read it – it is a masterpiece.

Waiting in the wings

The Little World of Don Camillo (Don Camillo Series Book 1)
Giovanni Guareschi

Another delightful recommendation from Sarah. Can’t wait.

Paperback and hardcover

One Row at a Time
Rochester A. Baker, Sr.

Rochester is in my Toastmasters club, Two Notch Toastmasters. He has written a lovely book which is both a memoir of lessons learned in his long life, “one row at a time,” and a tribute to his late wife Sheilda. She came with him to Toastmasters meetings years ago, before she passed. A wonderful elegy.

Gotta get back to my latest …

As you can see, I’m still finishing a couple or three. I’ll usually have four or five on the go at all times. Oh, yes, I read two Jack Reacher paperbacks as well this summer, but they’re in the car, destined for the Little Free Library on the corner and I can’t be bothered to dig them up.

A good book, a glass of sweet tea, and a little something to munch on – it don’t get better than this!

– Aunt Gem’s dad
Accentuate the Positive! · Gratitude · Hobbies · Introspection · just plain fun

Watching Life Instead of Living It

AuntGemLeave a comment

Now that the COVID-mania of 2020 and 2021 seems to have lifted, I want to live life instead of watching it happen. Doing, instead of being in the audience, is my thing. That’s why I joined the choir in my church – I didn’t want to just watch other people sing; I want to be in on it too! Why be a spectator?

I’ve made strides toward more living, less watching before. When I first moved into my house in December of 2016, I moved my circa-2000 television with me. That thing was an old bulky set – definitely not a flat screen. The remote control stopped working sometime in the late 2010s.

My TV looked a LOT like this one. Heck, it could have been this model.

I worked around it by actually getting up to change the channel, like in the 1970s. I started watching less and less television over the years, and I decided once I moved, I was going to put that old wreck on the curb and run an experiment: how long can I go without a TV in the house?

Continue reading “Watching Life Instead of Living It” →
My how the garden has grown….
Accentuate the Positive! · Beauty · Gardening · Hobbies · Podrick

My how the garden has grown….

AuntGem1 Comment

In the image above, Podrick is inspecting the Iris. I’m so grateful a previous owner planted these beautiful bulbs. And I’ve managed to keep them alive – no credit to me!

It is thrilling to see the plants coming up. Now I have to search for YouTube videos on how to know when they’ve finished growing … I’ve never grown spring onions or garlic before – when are they “finished”? When do I get to harvest them? I just did a search – and I cannot believe how many wonderful gardeners there are out there who have posted helpful tips on when to harvest garlic – and how. The word on Spring Onions – 8 weeks after sowing. Which is in about 2 weeks … I think. Perhaps I should start writing down when I sow the seeds. Ah, improvement for next year, and anything else I plant this year.

Spending hours on Gardening YouTube

Since it is raining now I have the chance to look at YouTube videos (again!) Looking at gardening videos is now my favorite form of web surfing. One of my favorities is GrowVeg, run by a lovely British man. This morning he taught me the best way to take care of my newly sown carrots.

Thanks to this gentleman’s tutelage I’m now investing in pallet collars for my next raised bed, and to replace the broken-down bed I’ve currently jerry-rigged together with baling wire. Actually after perusing the available options I may not – Uline.com wanted $151 for freight shipping for 2 pallet collars! That was more than the price of the items. Home Depot doesn’t have them. Argh, back to Amazon.

I’m so excited about the potato plants coming up I had to take pictures to share with you all. After many more YouTube videos I quickly realized I should have poked more drainage holes in the bottom of the five-gallon buckets (another lesson learned) but at least I’ve put them up off the ground slightly, to aid in drainage. The plants look terrific.

Those odds and ends of wood always come in handy in the garden.
Continue reading “My how the garden has grown….” →